Wah wahhhhhh!

Woh kuchh iss tadhaa se aayi
Ke uski aahat ka jadoo rom rom mein bassgaya

Woh kuchh iss tadhaa se muskuraayi
Ke woh dil ke kone kone mein phassgayi

Woh kuchh iss tadhaa se dekhein mujhe
Ke lagta hai jaise aankhon se hassgayi

Woh kuchh iss tadhaa se mehke aaj
Nahin uss jaisi koi bhi mahek joh dil ko yun kass gayi

Ji haan, huaa hai aaj nayi khushboo se milan
Na aane deynge abh uspar aanch

Woh hai woh hai Chanel Nambar paanch.

:p

Of thoughts and thinking

Pondering upon a single thought of ours
Can often result in a consequence
Entirely different from that perceived
In our original thought sequence.

If only we would take time to think
And re-process a particular thought we think
We would surprise ourselves upon realising
The extent of change the rethinking process can bring!

Tag it from the Top

Sayesha has beckoned a revival of this blog, if only on account of a tag. Hopefully, it'll be a new beginning for the revival of fruitful exchanges between me and myself! This one's for you Sayesha.

I said...

We live only once, so why not give it our best shot?

I want...

To learn so many things!!!

I wish...

I realise my dream of changing lives in some significant way.

I miss...

Blogging!!

I hear...

The persisitent noises typical of a sleepless and restless city.

I wonder...

Why people forget. If only we recognised that although we may not remember our words, our every interaction, someone up there does. And whatever we do / say will bear its consequence. Eventually.

I regret...

Taking life too seriously in the past.

I am...

Living each moment as it comes - squeeeezing the pleasure out of it! :)

I dance...

To practically anything as long as it's desi.

I sing...

From my heart.

I cry...

At least once a month. It cleanses my system flushing out all negativity. It helps maintain positivity in all my relationships, and most importantly, in my heart.

I am not...

Interested in interaction which forces me to be someone I am not.

I write...

To unleash my innermost thoughts.

I confuse...

Idealism with reality at times.

I need...

Time to myself, without which I can get quite irritable.

I should...

Take more vacation time to visit and catch up with people I haven't caught up with in ages!
(Afterthought: I should blog more often :p!)

I finish...

My first post in 6 months!!!

Yeh dil....

Dil kashmakash mein hai, lekin hai shaant bhi.
Dil aazaad hai lekin qayd bhi.

Dil pehchaanta nahin par jaanta hai.
Dil maanta nahin par jaanta toh hai.

Dil haaye, dil toh hai. Par dil saath nahin yaar.
Joh hota saath dhoondte na phirte dil ko baar baar.

Shaayad dil hai par kaabu mein nahin aaj kal.
Dil vaadiyon mein bhattak raha hai, samett rahaa hai guzre hue pal.

Dil kashmakash mein hai, par shaant bhi.
Dil aazaad hai aaj lekin qayd bhi.

Udhaas nahin hai dil
Bas thodi sa maayus hai yeh
Duniyaan dekh kar aksar hasta hai
Ghumon mein bhi gungunaataa hai yeh

Taajub hai ke joh baatein
Kabhi laati thi aankhon mein aansun
Aaj wohi dil ko behlaati hain
Eh dil, kahaan bhatak rahaa hai tu?

Duniyaa se toh umeed le haare hum
Lekin khud koh zindadil rakh behtHe hain
Bas raasta hai aur manzil hai, chalte jaana hai
Issi ko zindagi kehte hain.

I'm a Nobody

Does it matter who I am?
Or whether I exist?
Sometimes I melt into nothingness
And there's no trace of me...
Unless you really care to know
Where I am and how I'm doing.

Is it a facade?
An act put up to seek attention?
Nah - it's not attention that I crave.
Just someone who genuinely cares for me.
Someone who sincerely understands me.
As opposed to friends who drop in and out of my life.

But perhaps - I ask too much.
In recent years, I've tried not to expect anything.
It's been extremely difficult. Almost impossible.
And I haven't always succeeded.
But I can honestly say that I've sincerely tried to keep my expectations to a minimum.

Empty though. Just when I think I've worked things out...
It appears like I've got it all wrong.
Back to the drawing board princessse. This ain't it.
It's something else. It takes something else to keep a friend in life.
It takes more than minimal expectations.
More than love, genuineness, sincerity, understanding, a happy healthy friendship, honesty, and all those intricate ingredients that our closest relationships deserve.

But alas - there's no such thing as common courtesy.
No such thing as 'human' or empathy.
No such thing as concern for anyone other than oneself.
No worry in the world that our actions may have hurt someone else's feelings.
There's only ONE thing that the world understands universally.
ME.

It's a Shallow. Hollow. Empty feeling.

I've failed.

A dot is all I am.

.

Unless....

Aankhein

Beautiful eyes gazing
Talking with their gaze
Searching, soulful
Sending endearing praise
Watchful
Not a second adrift
I'm embraced
Adorned with love's gift.
Sweetness and warmth
Eyelashes naturally curled
Those eyes those eyes
My world my world.

Dil Dhoond Rahaa Hai

Dil dhoond rahaa hai ek sawaal ka jawaab
Par na soch kaam aaye, na guru, na kitaab

Kal tak toh lagaa tha
Ke tanhaayee baDgayi hai shaayad
Lekin agarr dil khud hee tanhaayee ko dhoonde
Phir tanhaayi se kya shikkaayad

Tanhaa honaa koi gunna toh nahin
Tanhaa rehnaa bhi ek kalaa hai
Kyun ke tanhaayee mein rehkar hee
Insaan khud se millaa hai

Leykin tanhaayee ki ek khataa hai huzurr
Tanhaayee mein kahin istarhaa na khojaayein
Ke khud ki pehchaan na rahe
Aur hum khud ko hi dhoondte rehjaayein

Insaan toh akhsar bheed mein khojaataa hai
Leykin aaj kal toh tanhaayee mein bhi kho behtTe hain khud ko hum
Chaahe paas aarahi khushi ke pehmaaney ho
Yah phir tarapte tanhaayi bharre sitamm

Phir bhi bheed se ziaadaa
Toh tanhaayee lagti hai pyaari
Kamse kam tanhaayee mein chaahe kuchh aur kyun na dikhe
Par dikhti zaruur hai apni parchaayee

Sabh kuchh saaf dikhrahaa hai
Aainaa bangayaa hai yeh tanhaa saffar
Khud ko dhoondne nikli thi mein
Har mod par mein milli mujhse, anjaan, bey-khabbar.

Bheed mein tanhaayi

Bheed mein tanhaayi si hai
Dil pooch rahaa hai aisa kyun?
Bas, yeh aansoon tapak pade hain aaj
Najaane yeh dil iss uljhann mein kyun...

Sabh kuchh hai yahaan
Lekin phir bhi ek kammi si hai
Sabh apne apne paas hain
Phir bhi ajeeb nammi si hai...

Shaayad yehi hai uljhann meri
Ke joh apne hain, woh hain bhi par nahin
Jab chaahti hoon woh hon paas apne
Dekhne mein woh hain kahin nahin

Mehsoos karna chaahti hoon unko
Par phir bhi, woh ehsaas na aaye
Dil bohut akelaa hai aaj
Aur bas, doobta doobta chalaa jaaye.

Koi sambhaalo issey.
Bheed mein bhi hone lagi tanhaayi
Kaash paas aakar koi duur karta issey
Varna iss tanhaayi se na jaaoon maari.

Journey without a destination

I think of life and ask myself 'where am I now'...
Sometimes it's nice to know how far I have come...
Funnily enough though, the answer most often is
My dear, you haven't moved at all, your journey hasn't even begun...



'But so much time has passed and been lost' I retort,
'Where has it all gone? ' :(
'Surely, I must have gotten somewhere?'
'You've triumphed small battles here and there, but the WAR has yet to be won.'


I look around me and I'm unable to see anything
I feel that things around me have changed in every way
I feel small, humbled and subdued
Will I stay forever this way?


The fight is going on constantly I know
But I do not want to partake in it. I want out.
For me, life has a deeper meaning in its journey
And making the most of that journey is what life's ALL about.

Remember November...

It's one of my favourite times of the year...
These November days are very special to me
So much so that each special November day
Is honoured and deeply etched into my memory...

Special for so many reasons
None I care to speak of I say
But the emotional peace and love I feel these days
No other month can make me feel this way.

It's nostaglic when I think back
Recalling each November I've lived
So reminiscient, so beautiful, so new
And with each November, came a very special gift.

No, it's not my birthday,
But forever a celebratory start
To the winter each year
For special is November, and close to my heart.

Deep down, I'm the only one who knows
Why Nostalgic November Numbs me so
Oh, it's so enticing...
Beautiful November, take me wherever you go.

How interesting!!

What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

Ouch

A silent communication exists between us
Sometimes, we want to be in touch
But words are lost ... lost in the myriad maze of our minds
Thoughts are lost in the dark dungeons of distance

I no longer exist
But . . . they still exist...
Thoughts... memories...
Leave... please

I dont want them
I want peace
I know....
They continue to tease

Mocking me
Piercing me
I dont know why
Please, let's say goodbye?

Come Tomorrow...
I embrace you
Now, begone
Be banished forever
In the deep forests of wherever

Far...where I dont even know of your existence
So that I cannot fathom where you might be
Better than knowing but not knowing
Better than not seeing yet seeing what I'm not supposed to see.

The X-Factor

We all spend so much of our days, weeks, months, years, lives looking for that special X-FACTOR in our lives. We keep looking for that one thing - that special something that we've all come to call the 'X-factor'.

However, so often, without our even realising, the X-factor pervades our day making us smile, laugh, enjoy life and experience all those emotions that we hunger to experience as humans.

A few months ago, I found the X-factor in my life... and it's just so amazing coz now that I've discovered it, come sunshine or rain, whatever be the season or the reason, I have beautiful days. It's amazing to know that a little something in your life can turn your world upside down. In my case, it's turned it upside UP :).

MAKE WAY people - the X-factor exists but it's for YOU to discover it.

The Grandeur of Small Things

Sometimes it just takes a lil bit of thought, a tiny effort to make someone's day. It's almost as if in God's (the Higher Power or Higher Energy, call it what you may) great magnificient design, we are each given the power to influence someone else's day. And so I find, that if I look hard enough for the 'interventions' in my own day, I am blessed with many many sweet interventions.

Even if I tried to make a list of all of them, it wouldn't do justice to all those things that do make a difference to my day thatI remain unaware of. But here's my limited glimpse of those things that really mean so much to me and that I notice!

• Someone who does a tiny special something just to make me smile or to make me laugh or to let me know that they were thinking of me.

• My mum, who will call me more than five times each afternoon even if she can't get through to me on her first three attempts (which should usually send the message that I'm extremely stuck up with some work and so, can't return her calls) - just to make sure that she asks me what I would like to have for dinner that evening, so that she knows I'm eating something I will enjoy.

• My aunt who will call me everytime she notes an achievement that I have made (no matter how tiny) in order to congratulate me on moving forward in life and being a step closer to my goals.

• My dad who is endlessly frustrated with today's super-fast-pace-of-life that it so gets to him. But somehow, he always manages to come up with a reaaaaaallyyyyy corny joke, at which I cannot help but smile!

• Someone who ensures that I always get my 'time-out' in the day so that I can let go or chillax in my own space.

• Someone who is thoughtful enough to make sure that I get my daily dose of nature and exercise in some form or means, so that I do not become mad venturing from one set of four-walls, into another set of four-walls.

• Someone who hates doing some of the things that I do, but will do it nonetheless every now and then, just because they know it would mean a lot to me.

• Someone who is a total clown and makes sure that he reminds me of this every day. He will make himself out to be a total clown (even when he knows he's being really silly) by blurting out something completely absurd in the midst of a conversation that he's really uninterested in or in order to burst the bubble of a realllllyyyy uncomfortable situation!

These are some of little joys which I am blessed to experience everyday. :) And it serves to remind me how even the smallest of thoughts translated into action can make a huge difference to someone else's day.

When I was young I used to believe that God had chosen me to be an instrument of His and that I had some Special work to do here. This belief of mine still holds true (though I often forget this in the hullaballoo of my day!). The only difference is that I think that each one of us here has the same special work to do in His grand design. We just don't know it.

Kuch Kuch Hota Hai

Sometimes I wonder why certain people have such an impact on my life. Of course, there are those, whose importance and impact is very easy to explain. In fact, it's but natural to think that the things they say or do would make a significant difference in my life...

But then there are certain others. People who for an inexplicable reason or perhaps reason unknown to us... just make such a difference to our day that we almost wonder if there isn't some magical pull or power in their souls that just makes us naturally react positively (or negatively) to their actions, their words, or even their mere presence.

Sometimes, people who have this impact on me are miles away from me. Far far away.. Yet at times, just by thinking of them, or what they might be doing on a given day, just sends my heart fluttering and skipping a beat. These people may not be those who I've interacted with on a regular basis or people I've been close friends with or anything like that. Yet there's just something so mesmerising, almost magnetic about their personality that just makes my heart smile.

The mere thought of them makes my heart smile.

To know that there are people who can do that to me. . . kuchh kuchh hota hai... (a little something happens [to me])...